February 27, 2008 7:45 PM
Girls just wanna have fun
Throw a lava lamp, some bell bottoms and platform shoes on the stage and you would've recreated the 1970s Wednesday night, as the 10 female finalists on American Idol vied not to get sent home.
They did an OK job, but there were no "bladder control moments" -- you know, where you get so excited you almost wet yourself. (Almost.)
Carly Smithson, 24, kicked things off with Heart's Crazy for You. Carly has one of the contest's strongest voices, yet here she never quite belted it out.
Syesha Mercado, 21, acquitted herself nicely with Billy Paul's Me and Mrs. Jones (here, Me and Mr. Jones). She was smooth and tonally on target, although it didn't smolder like the original. Judge Simon Cowell seemed to have trouble wrapping his little mind around the gender change in the lyrics, stating: "It's silly for a girl to sing" that.
Carly Simon's You're So Vain was Brooke White's song of choice. I disagree with the judges who said it was the perfect song for her. White, 24, hit every note, but lacked the sneering angst of the original.
Also lacking the force of the original was Thelma Houston's Don't Leave me This way, sung by Ramiele Malubay, 20. Here again, a singer with a great voice, brought virtually no personality to her performance. As they say in the 'hood, she should have "gone to church" on that song.
Clearly the judges want more than just great vocals; they want performances.
Even when the judges don't make sense (and I'm mostly talking about Randy Jackson, who can be both enthusiastic and obtuse at the same time), they understand that it's not enough just to sing a song. You have to sell it.
Not such luck for Kristy Lee Cook, 24. I've heard better renditions of You're No Good at karoake bars. Kristy seemed uncomfortable singing something so raw.
Rock and roll nurse Amanda Overmyer, 23, had one of the night's stranger song choices in Kansas' Carry On Wayward Son. The judges focused less on her singing than on her looks, especially that faux skunk highlighting ("terrible hair" said Simon) and her acid-washed jeans.
Personally, I had more problems with the bright blue cocktail dress Alaina Whitaker, 17, wore. She looked like a giant eraser.
Sadly, her take on Hopelessly Devoted from Grease didn't make me forget the outfit. I had to agree with Simon: "It's almost as if your grandmother prepared you for this audition."
Alexandrea Lushington, 17, had the night's second peculiar song, Chicago's If You Leave Me Now. Why would someone with such a powerful voice settle for a middle of the road ballad? There may be safety in numbers, but there's none in dull songs.
Kady Malloy, 18, gave us Heart's Magic Man. The only thing missing was the magic. It was boring -- all heart and no soul.
Asia'h Epperson, 19, ended things with All By Myself. Great ballad. Average performance.
Thursday night's show will continue the winnowing. Two guys and two girls will be sent packing.
I predict that Kristy Lee Cook and Asia'h Epperson will go home.
The remaining 16 men and women will perform next Tuesday and Wednesday. What do you bet we'll be hearing songs from the '80s? Maybe a little Twisted Sister?
Judging by the success of the Van Halen reunion tour, big hair still sells.
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