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Mel Berg of Westminster writes:

It was our family reunion on Amtrak from Denver to Glenwood Springs. The day was sunny and clear as the train wound through the majestic Rocky Mountains and along the winding river and across the open meadows.
It was exciting to see rafters slicing through the rapids. Suddenly, we were shocked to see rafters and campers mooning our family and others that were riding the train! It was ugly! We saw men and women on the river and at camp sites pulling down their pants and bending over with their butts up. It was sick. It’s an ugly scar to beautiful Colorado. It’s also bad advertisement for the state of Colorado. It’s disgusting behavior for little children to see!
Where are the sheriff and his deputy?
A relative from Missouri suggested that the local sheriff should use a high-powered paint-ball gun and do target practice. How about the sheriff hiding in the brush and using a shotgun with buckshot? Amtrak could sell entertainment tickets and buy a new rail line so it wouldn’t waste time and money waiting on freight and coal trains.
Another suggested that a $500.00 fine should be levied on each of them for indecent exposure.
It was also suggested that NASA take pictures from outer-space and post them at every Colorado post office and on the internet, then when they have a match arrest them.
For those who think this is wholesome fun: What happens when a young child goes to school and moons classmates? What will the teachers and principal do?
Let’s keep Colorado respectable and beautiful!

This letter has not been edited.

READER COMMENTS

I would have been howling with laughter, and my family right with me. You can`t shoot folks who offend you, even if they are breaking the law and I am not sure a "moon" is prohibited.

My God we need yet another law about public behavior.

Post the pictures of what? Their moons? then we go look at them and try to match them?

Goddess I love this forum and the letters to the editorial section. As Chas B. always says, "you can`t make this stuff up folks".

Consiter it a honor

Dear Mr Berg,
I'm sure NASA would be happy to help, after they stop laughing.
If your kids haven't seen a pair of buttocks by now , you've been WAY over protective.
Please lighten up, life's too short to worry about other people's butts.
And welcome to Colorado.

I can'twait to go camping and rafting!!!

DAMN...THAT'S FUNNY! Grow some thicker skin Mel!

People sure are funny about lewd acts performed in front of their kids.Too late for this go-around,but if Mel takes that train trip regularly,a cell phone with a camera might be kinda handy-then he could e-mail the evidence to the local sheriff.

Well, after Mels letter, I bet Am track gets a boost in sales for that run.

This reminds me of a story my mom used to tell. Back in the early 60's, my dad was stationined at an Air Force base in Japan. There was this Japanese guy who was always doing his business near the base housing. My mother complained to the base authorities, etc...who did nothing. One day, my mom got a sling shot and fair sized stone, found the guy at nature's call...took careful aim and got him dead center in his crack. According to my mom, he yelped, cursed in Japanese and ran off trying to put on his pants. He never came back. If my mom were alive now and did that, it would be in the papers, an assault, maybe a international incident, etc. I agree with the letter writer, something should be done. I suggest a sling shot and good aim.

This reminds me of a story my mom used to tell. Back in the early 60's, my dad was stationined at an Air Force base in Japan. There was this Japanese guy who was always doing his business near the base housing. My mother complained to the base authorities, etc...who did nothing. One day, my mom got a sling shot and fair sized stone, found the guy at nature's call...took careful aim and got him dead center in his crack. According to my mom, he yelped, cursed in Japanese and ran off trying to put on his pants. He never came back. If my mom were alive now and did that, it would be in the papers, an assault, maybe a international incident, etc. I agree with the letter writer, something should be done. I suggest a sling shot and good aim.

Methinks you have all together to much time on your hands Mel but, aside from that my prudish and humor lacking friend, isn't it true , as is indicated by the amount of space you give to the various humoristic solutions offered by your fellow travellers to the perceived problem, that the whole situation provided you with more enjoyment and entertainment than offence.

Best Letter Ever.

This story reminds me of the old Eric Clapton song. I shot the sheriff,but I did not shoot the deputy. LOL

Mooning people on a train? The kids probably thought it was the highlight of their trip!

Did you get any pictures? You can title them Bare in the woods.

This really is one for the ages:)

Will anyone top the laughs I got today?

Thanks Mel, you made my week!

So y'all think exposing children to adult nakedness is funny?An honor?That a parent who's upset about it is prudish and lacking in humor?That he needs to thicken his skin?
Not much regard for children here.

I doubt the kids saw much more then the average bent over man shows. Don`t they call that a "plumbers moon".?

More like a half moon then a full moon.

Will Colorado forever be the butt of jokes now.

What is the worst outsiders will think...that Colorado is behind the times?

...A relative from Missouri ...

Isn't Missouri the Show Me State?

Mel, I'd like to moon you too.

Hahahahahahahaha! Now that's funny Mel!

Jimminy:

Explain what harm comes to a child by seeing nudity that is not wrought by an inappropriate and disproportionate parental reaction to it such as the one you and the letter writer display so vividly? Should we all get ourselves neck braces so we can never look down?

What specifically is wrong with nudity and how is the sight of it bad for children? (Note: I'm not talking about nudity in a sexual context).

And for the record, I had merely called this the Best. Letter. Ever.

Jimminy tell us truly: Are you just taking the piss?

This mooning is done in a spirit of silliness, not out of disrespect. The mooners are anonymous, as are the moonees — nothing personal about it. Sure, it has shock value, and its very unexpectedness, naughtiness, and absurdity are what make it fun.

If the mooners held up a sign that said, "Here's to you, Mel," it would be personal. But given the distance and the tinted windows, the mooners can't see Mel; they don['t know Mel, they don't know Mel is on the train, they don't know that he is on their side of the train or even looking out the window. They are simply mooning a train. They are on vacation. The travellers are on vacation. It's time for lightheartedness and frivolity. The mooners don't go around mooning people at school, in the office, on city streets — wrong time, wrong place.

I've taken this trip several times, child in tow, and it's laugh time for us. A bare butt from far away is just a bare butt.

This mooning is done in a spirit of silliness, not out of disrespect. The mooners are anonymous, as are the moonees — nothing personal about it. Sure, it has shock value, and its very unexpectedness, naughtiness, and absurdity are what make it fun.

If the mooners held up a sign that said, "Here's to you, Mel," it would be personal. But given the distance and the tinted windows, the mooners can't see Mel; they don['t know Mel, they don't know Mel is on the train, they don't know that he is on their side of the train or even looking out the window. They are simply mooning a train. They are on vacation. The travellers are on vacation. It's time for lightheartedness and frivolity. The mooners don't go around mooning people at school, in the office, on city streets — wrong time, wrong place.

I've taken this trip several times, child in tow, and it's laugh time for us. A bare butt from far away is just a bare butt.

This mooning is done in a spirit of silliness, not out of disrespect. The mooners are anonymous, as are the moonees — nothing personal about it. Sure, it has shock value, and its very unexpectedness, naughtiness, and absurdity are what make it fun.

If the mooners held up a sign that said, "Here's to you, Mel," it would be personal. But given the distance and the tinted windows, the mooners can't see Mel; they don['t know Mel, they don't know Mel is on the train, they don't know that he is on their side of the train or even looking out the window. They are simply mooning a train. They are on vacation. The travellers are on vacation. It's time for lightheartedness and frivolity. The mooners don't go around mooning people at school, in the office, on city streets — wrong time, wrong place.

I've taken this trip several times, child in tow, and it's laugh time for us. A bare butt from far away is just a bare butt.

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