November 10, 2008 10:00 AM
Wanna buy a Palin progeny?
First the election, now the kids? Is Sarah Palin so upset at losing the election that she would put her kids up for adoption? Not exactly. It's not Palin doing the offering, but you can still adopt your own Track, Trig, Bristol and Piper if the price is right. TMZ.com first reported that the Anchorage Animal Shelter is offering four animals for adoption sporting the Palin monikers. Check out the site. Now you ask yourself: what constitutes a good Republican pet? Dogs? Monkeys? Cats? Snakes? Try birds.
Quote-worthy: My favorite celebrity quote in the wake of Barack Obama's presidential election win last Tuesday comes from author-poet Maya Angelou, who told the Associated Press of the victory: "I thought of my people, African-Americans. I thought of white Americans. I thought of Asians and Spanish people. And I thought, 'My God! What a country. What a country.' I believe that in the secret heart of every American there's a desire to live in a great country. And look at us now."
Cruise control: Does anyone but me expect Tom Cruise's new movie Valkyrie to be a dog? It tells the story of a 1944 assassination attempt on Hitler. This is a holiday movie? You may recall that first Germany didn't want Scientologist Cruise to shoot the film in that country, then wouldn't let him shoot a scene at the historic Bendlerblock complex. The trailers for Valkyrie emphasize action and suspense (will the fomenters be caught?). Despite the film being directed by X-Men helmer Bryan Singer, I'm not feeling it. Really, I'm not.
Cook-ing on a low flame: I do not like Dane Cook. I don't think he's a very good actor and he's an even worse comedian. None of which explains how I found myself watching 45 minutes of his viral video series "You Suck at Photoshop" the other day. It's like someone plopped a big bowl of lime Jell-O in front of me and said "Eat until you can't go anymore." I mention the series because I know there are Dane Cook fans out there. I was at a party once where a group of teens and twentysomethings spent an hour guffawing at a Cook comedy special. And this was before anyone had tapped the keg. The "Photoshop" series is found on Harry Shearer's Mydamnchannel.com. There are 20 videos thus far, during which an unseen narrator alternately chastises and encourages the viewer while demonstrating things you can do in photoshop (i.e., digitally vandalize the van of the man who took your wife away). Most of the videos run 5-7 minutes long, and take every second of that time to make their point. Are they funny? Sure, if you like your humor as dry as the Sahara.
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